The Menace called “Performance Anxiety”

Frohes Neues Jahr Freunde<3.

2023 is here and I believe it’s beautiful that my first post of this very important year stems from something that I’ve allowed hold me back for a long time and at the same time, something the Holy Spirit is really working on me concerning.

Slavery…

I know i may sound like a broken record with how often i write about fear and how it had me in a choke hold but i do this by the leading of the Spirit hoping to encourage someone out there by continuously saying indeed “Christ’s perfect love casts away all fear“.

You see, for me to come on here and share something that could possibly be read by millions of people gave me so much anxiety especially on those days when i felt like i couldn’t even properly articulate what i was feeling. I know God led me to start this blog but….

“Will these writings make sense?” “What if i’m misunderstood?” “What if no-one reads them? I’m not good or knowledgeable enough to write on that topic”. I believe that’s where performance anxiety stems from: A lack of trust or confidence in who God has said you are or what He has called you to do which plainly speaking is a lack of trust in the character of God.

We allow these discouraging thoughts to turn us into over-thinkers and we forget that God never called you to a thing that He was never going to back you up in. I was not called to do this so i could watch the numbers, he called me to do this and in His call is the qualification, grace and ability and that’s all that matters. I believe that with this mentality, we will watch the anxiety of fulfilling Gods purpose for our lives begin to fizzle out…..

He is Abba…

In 2023, Abba is not calling you to be bold and step out in faith and then turning his back on you and telling you to figure it out on your own. In the scriptures, we see Jesus tell the disciples, you will be my witnesses to the ends of the earth but i will not leave you helpless, I will send you the Holy Spirit(John14:18-26).

This already speaks to the character of our father, as a father who faithfully watches over His children. In 2022, i made a God-decision to move to another country, all i had was that God told me to reject other choices and go there. One morning as i pondered on that instruction and all i could see was isolation, i remember asking the Holy Spirit why? why here? and He lovingly answered back, i want to bring you to a place of total dependency on me.

Few months after i had moved, I remember standing in the kitchen and just feeling the weight of this new, unfamiliar journey and so many things that had not yet materialised and how hard it all felt, I still didn’t feel good enough for anything God was calling me to and the Holy Spirit started to reveal to my heart that i was only feeling this way because i was still waiting to “feel good enough“. He never called me here to begin to rely on myself and reminded me of what He told me before I moved here(A place of total dependency on Him).

I was never to look to myself, for by strength shall no man prevail, the bible says that those who know their God will be strong and do exploits(Daniel11:32b), not those who feel good or strong or brave enough…Friends, i started to rejoice, thank you Jesus that i don’t have to have it all figured out, all I have to do is to trust, obey and faithfully watch you bring all you’ve said about me to pass.

Intimacy…

Finally, i would like to say that i know many of us have received words for the year or have plans and goals etc but what is most important beyond these great revelations is to continue to seek and pursue intimacy with God in its truest form and just obey whatever He leads you in your heart to do from that place of intimacy no matter how small or big it seems. I believe it was Apostle Joshua Selman, a great preacher of the gospel in Nigeria who once said that many of the things we seek for are pursuing a man of intimacy, so we must learn to cultivate our relationship with God first and foremost as the well where our very lives in this year and beyond will flow from.

This is my desire, to continue to know Jesus and make Him known through this blog and through my life. So, it is my prayer that every post will find a hungry heart who needed those exact words and may they be the catalyst for a fresh perspective and by the grace of God, a better tomorrow filled with Light that only Jesus can provide.

Did this bless you? Please leave a comment and share this post to everyone you know. I’ll write to you soon but till then, Please never forget that Jesus still saves today!!